Yes, read the title and weep tears of joy. Holographic drum heads are now available at customskins.
I know what you’re thinking. You don’t deserve this, right?
Wrong! You DO deserve it. You work hard. You put in the hours. You never chose to be here in the first place. So perhaps it’s time to treat yo’self?
Here’s what a holographic bass drum head looks like:
Amazing, isn’t it. And here’s the thing: they look even better IRL. Here’s a crappy video to demonstrate.
Yes, the holographic catches the light and shines in every damn colour in the spectrum. EVERY DAMN COLOUR.
We can print your logo in holographic. You can have solid colours AND holographic colours. You can have anything you damn well want, this is Customskins buddy.
Word to the wise – the holographic works best when contrasted on a black background. Keep it in mind pal.
To order a Holographic drum head just hit this magical button on the Custom Design quote page and all your dreams will come true.
What are you waiting for? Order now!
DIE CUT VINYL STICKERS NOW AVAILABLE AT CUSTOMSKINS KLAXON!!!
I know what you’re thinking: Stickers? WTF? And the answer to your question is yes, stickers. Little adhesive pictures sent straight from heaven. Yes, mortal, Customskins is now channelling the gluey graphics of the Gods for your benefit so THOU SHALL BECOME FAMOUS AND RICH.
Our stickers are printed on high quality waterproof vinyl and die cut to any shape you desire. Here’s how you order them:
- Go to this page: http://customskins.co.uk/products/vinyl-stickers/
- Choose a size and quantity you like. If you don’t like any of the sizes and quantities email us and we will create new sizes and quantities for you.
- Download a template from http://customskins.co.uk/products/vinyl-stickers/ and create your design.
- Order them with typing and clicking and money.
- Email us your artwork and order number.
- Anticipate the arrival of your shiny beautiful stickers is 5 days or less. Bask in the glory of your excellent decision making skills.
Once again Christmas has come around, like the guy who comes round to read your gas meter. And when the guy who comes round to read your gas meter comes round to read your gas meter you know to expect a bill, like when you order the braised duck head at your local oriental restaurant. There’s a bill coming. If you get my drift. (It’s a duck bill).
The Christmas ‘duck bill’, if you will, is buying gifts for your friends and family, which is not now merely expected, but mandatory under EU law. It’s very difficult to do this as most people have all the stuff they need by now, so you’re essentially just guessing if Auntie Jean would like a MIG welder.
Fortunately, the 2014 Customskins Christmas Gift Guide is here to solve all your gifting dilemmas. Admittedly the gifts are best suited to individuals with an interest in drums and percussion, but in this day and age who doesn’t. To assist you in your choices we’ve conveniently categorised suitable gifts by how well you know your loved one.
1. I barely know my loved one but if he says I’m his father who am I to argue?
If you suspect your loved one is a complete stranger but have no biological evidence to the contrary we recommend Gift Vouchers. Customskins Gift Vouchers come in increments of £20, so you can gear your gift to how well you did in the 80’s property boom. 4 of them will get an off the shelf design, 5 will get a crest style design, 6 will get a fully customised skin, and 10 will get a majority shareholding in customskins.co.uk.
The great thing about Gift Vouchers is that your lucky recipient can choose exactly what they want, so you literally have to know nothing about them at all. We like Gift Vouchers because sometimes lazy people don’t use them, so we literally get free money.
2. I know the nationality of my loved one but not a great deal more
If you’ve heard banging from your loved one’s bedroom, interspersed with cursing in a foreign or domestic accent it’s safe to say your recipient has an interest in drumming and a nationality. If this is the case our Off The Shelf designs are the perfect gift.
As well as super-safe flag designs we’ve introduced some exciting new designs for the 2014 Christmas rush, including ‘Fried Breakfast’, ‘Camera Lens’, Pink Swirl’ and ‘Golf Ball’. If your recipient likes fried breakfasts, photography, pink swirls or golfing these could be the perfect gifts.
3. I’ve stalked my loved one on Facebook and have discovered their initials
If you’ve discovered your loved one’s initials you’re at a significant advantage over less well-informed gifters. Simply choose one of our Crest Design heads.
We’ve introduced two new crest designs for the 2014 Festive season, so your choices are almost limitless (4). Simply type their initials into the internet box, hand over some cyber money and you’ll be kicking back with a mints pie before you know it. We’ve even introduced a new fiberskyn style look for those drummers who like their drums to resemble a deceased animal.
If you don’t know your loved one’s initials worry not – you can choose other acronyms according to their interests. For example a seaman may like ‘HMS’, a motor racing driver might enjoy ‘MPH’, and ‘DP’ would be ideal for somebody who likes Doctor Pepper.
4. I know my loved one’s computer password
For those of you with an intimate knowledge of your loved one’s filesystem why not go all the way with a totally customised Custom Skin from Customskins? If they’re in a band you’re going to need to filter through their sexy selfies to find their logo, or you could even create a design yourself if you think you’re Picasso or Mary Berry or something.
This is a such a thoughtful, meaningful gift it’s worth considering prior to purchase whether your relationship with the proposed recipient is worth pursing long-term. If so, you may also like to consider our range of special finishes including ‘Mirror Chrome’, ‘Brushed Gold’ and ‘Toffee Apple’.
As with any purchase, make sure you measure your loved ones’ bass drum prior to ordering. This will ensure the resulting custom skin is the correct size.
We take 5 working days to print a custom skin. Our Off The Shelf designs and Crests are also printed to order, so if you’re aiming not to ruin Christmas try and order before the 16th December. Or even earlier if you live in Indonesia, Easter Island or France.
For help with your custom skin purchase just contact us here, or call our Custom Skin Hotline on 0207 426 0692.
No, this isn’t a drill – here at Customskins HQ we’ve been burning the midnight oil developing not just one but three NEW THINGS.
“NEW THINGS” I hear you say. Everyone loves new things so they can fiddle about with them until they become old things and then you can get new things again!
Our new things are TWO (2) new crest designs you can use to personalise your drumkit, and one new finish you can use to personalise your drum kit!
Here’s the first new thing combined with the third new thing. It’s a new crest design called the RETRO CREST, so called because it’s very retro unlike all our other crests which are super futuristic, combined with a new finish called FIBERSKYN LOOK which makes your drum head look like a fiberskyn even though it isn’t one.
Two birds, meet stone:
The second thing is another new crest, but instead of being vertical it’s horizontal. Take off your up and down glasses and put on your across glasses because this is gonna blow your mind:
The crests work exactly the same as our other crests: Just contact your biological parents, find out your initials, type them into the box, cross our palms with silver and the skin is yours. We can combine these crests with all our current finishes including ‘mirror chrome’, brushed aluminium’ and ‘dolphin’.
To create the Fiberskyn Look we print a fiberskyn style background texture onto a Remo Ambassador drum head and lovingly protect it with a matt film to achieve a true Fiberskyn Look. You can use this with all our personalised skins, along with our full big boy custom printed drum heads.
If you have any questions regarding our three NEW THINGS please direct them to our ‘contact page‘ where a customer representative is awaiting your message.
A lot of people come up to me and ask how much a custom skin is and naturally I reply that if you have to ask you can’t afford it. This isn’t true, of course, as they’re only £99.99 and I only say it because I heard it once on TV or in a public toilet. Most people *can* afford £99.99 – it’s the price of three pints in Customskins’ local pub. But enough about gentrification, let’s talk about expensive boats.I went to the London International Boat Show once and they had all kinds of boats. Big boats, little boats, boats which make you sick, boats which make other people sick. You could go in some of the boats and fairly realistically imagine you were a prosthetic limb billionaire, if it weren’t for all the other people in the boat also pretending they were prosthetic limb billionaires.The London Drum Show is a bit like this except you can’t go inside the drums and drink a gin, and instead of imagining yourself to be a wealthy jetsetter you imagine yourself to be the drummer in AC/DC, which is almost equally as exciting. They have drums for rock, drums for jazz, drums for transporting oil, all the drums. You can look at them and touch them and imagine divorcing your wife so you can put them all in your house and be happy forever.This year (2014) is extra special as Customskins.co.uk will be there. You can look at the customed skins, look at us, and buy us all the beer you owe us for getting drum skins to you extra quickly so Jools Holland knows which band to point at when he reads out your name on the autocue.And when you come up to me at the London Drum Show and ask how much a custom skin is I will reply Sir (even if you are female), it is your lucky day, for we are offering a show special 20% discount. Therefore, a customskin is £99.99 minus 20% – a mere two and a half pints at Customskins’ local.If you are attending the show please come and say hello to us – we’ll be on stand 72. If you’re not attending the show, I apologise profusely for wasting your time.
We just launched gift vouchers at customskins.co.uk. Here’s a mailout we sent out about them, which has been picked up by news agencies across the globe. You can sign up to the customskins.co.uk mailing list on the signupamabob thingy on the footer:
What’s up (drum) players?
For those of you new to the customskins list, welcome. If you want news, trivia, special offers and coarse fishing tips delivered directly to your promotions tab twice yearly from the greatest drumskin printing company on earth you’re in the right place. DON’T click unsubscribe – every time someone unsubscribes God kills a kitten with another kitten.
For those of you not new to the customskins list, guys – what’s going on?!!! XOX
Let me level with you – I’m not *just* getting in touch to say hi and shoot the proverbial you know what. I’m going to try selling you something, and this time around it’s not my car.
So we’ve always thought it would be a great idea to have customskins gift vouchers so that you can give the gift of a customskin. It is, after all, the greatest gift. We’ve also always thought about it but not done it because, y’know, life is short and there’s other stuff to do instead of trying to have a business which actually makes money.
But, as you know, the economy is how it is, and Ruddles isn’t getting any cheaper, so I spoke to my computer tapper guys and I said guys: has internet software programming technology developed to the level whereby we can offer some kind of ‘gift vouchers’ which can be redeemed through a website, probably ours?
And they were like, “yeah, months ago”, so I remortgaged my home, sold my Royal Mail shares, and here we are today. GIFT VOUCHERS for us. New AUDI for the computer tappers.
Here’s how it works:
– You have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA what to buy Frank, Romeo or Lucy for Christmas. TOTALLY impossible to buy for. Impossible.
– You remember that Frank plays the drums. That’s what all the banging is, hopefully.
– You decide to buy him a customskin from customskins. It is the greatest gift a gifter can give.
– You realise you know almost nothing about Frank’s life, interests or ambitions. How do you design a customskin for somebody you know nothing about. Is Frank on drugs?
– You buy Frank GIFT VOUCHERS for a customskin. Frank can empty the dark contents of his pysche onto his own customskin.
– Everybody is happy.
So what do you think? Gift vouchers! They come in a nice card and we’ll deliver them to you for FREE. You can order them in increments of £20, but it’s best to go north of £60 since we don’t sell anything that’s less than £60. Our only product available for less than £60 is DHL UK delivery, so your lucky recipient could either get £60 off a customskin, or we could deliver nothing to him or her 6 or 7 times using DHL’s fine overnight service. I’ve had worse xmas gifts.
Here’s the product page where you can read all about these wonderful GIFT VOUCHERS: http://www.customskins.co.uk/products/gift-vouchers/
That’s the size of it.
Attention marketing students! If you want success in the cut-throat industry of selling stuff forget everything you’ve been taught and read on…
What I’m going to show you here is the advertising strategy that sold (give or take) a million drum heads, and put CUSTOM SKINS firmly on the map as one of the most highly respected organisations out there, across all industries and every market in the world.
It’s called the FOUR SEASONS method, and consists of four advertisements covering every season and all four of the primary human emotions.
This advert is all about fear. The slogan ‘CUSTOMSKINS.CO.UK CAUSES DRUMSKINS’ is blunt and sinister, and ‘CONSULT YOUR PHYSICIAN’ hammers the fear factor home with nails of terror. Of course, if you did fly to America to consult your physician (physicians don’t exist here in the UK) the cost of private medical treatment would make a custom drum head an attractive proposition cost-wise. That’s what makes this advert so effective in converting sales.
Everyone wants something for nothing, and spring is the time to get out there Kayaking. That’s what makes this advert so effective. Of course, there is no Kayak (let alone a SEA kayak), but that doesn’t matter. The reader is associating the kayak with a custom skin, and associating the word ‘WIN’ with the word ‘BUY’. Marketing gold.
The summer is when everyone is spending all their money on beer and failed military coups. It’s a terrible time to try and sell custom drum heads. Try it! That’s why you have to target an older, wealthier market, who are determined to spend every last penny of your inheritance on worthless garbage. The words ‘luxury’, ‘comfort’ and ‘golf’ are guaranteed to get the older guys drooling, and the subliminal drum head in the background does the rest. BAM!
As any marketing professional knows, you can literally sell anything to anyone at Christmas. Jay-Z famously sold ice in the winter, and water to a well. That’s why you don’t have to put much effort in – in fact, the lower the effort, the higher your ROI. This advert is particularly effective thanks to it’s nonsensical tagline, and the illegible web address with hints of Christmas, resulting in one of the highest grossing magazine ads in advertising history.
So there you go. The FOUR SEASONS METHOD. Use it carefully, for it is powerful.
All the above advertisements appeared in DRUMMER magazine.
Welcome to the new Customskins website!
I know what you're thinking right – are there not laws about this sort of desecration? There ARE, but contrary to what you may have believed the old customskins website was not a world heritage site, grade 1 listed building, or area of outstanding natural beauty (HAHAHA). So we made a new one, and demolished the old one using the 'drag into the recycle bin' technique. Here's one last look:
Say goodbye – the next occassion you'll see that badboy will be in hell.
Here's how we made the brand new CustomSkins 2013 website in 6 easy steps:
1. We started with a dream
Remember when your parents tell you that you can do anything that you want in life, right, and you're all like MUM I WANT TO DO A SLIGHTLY BETTER VERSION OF THE CUSTOM SKINS WEBSITE and she's like son, don't take it too literally and I'm not even your real mum ok? Well, we bothered anyway.
As Wayne Gretsky once said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don't take”. This was our shot, and we took it.
2. A dream isn't enough so we used money
Naturally there's pretty severe limitations as to what you can do with a dream, some Holz reinforcers and that plunger we once used to demonstrate the size of the Stageworks matt on the custom skins blog, so I called some guys who tap on computers for a living. They needed money to buy more androids or weblogs or something so they agreed to arrange some 1s and 0s in such a way as we would have a new website, in exchange for money. Seemed like a great idea so we bit their hands off! Then we had to pay to have them reattached. More money wasted!
3. We got some celebs to help
Without celebrities nothing has any worth at all and the world is just a load of people wandering around trying not to punch each other. In order to add weight to our offering we got some genuine professionals on board who have used customskins, and are willing to concede that success in the music industry is 20% talent and 80% having the right customskin.
4. We designed cool bits so you feel special
Like the gallery, which we've updated a bit, and the user area where you can, err, use the site within a specific area? I guess.
You can do all the ordering online and you can see the status of your order and you can probably do other stuff? Let us know in the comments!
5. We assuaged your guilt
I know, you're feeling bad about all the work we've done on this, and you haven't done anything. Right?
Well to make you feel better we've put the price of delivery up to something approaching what it actually costs to deliver a drum head. Don't mention it, guys!
6. We didn't *quite* finish it
You know you want to design drum heads on our website, and I know I want you to design drum heads on our website. All my contacts on match.com know you want to design drum heads on our website. We can almost do it. It's just, y'know… give us a bit of time.
So there you go. Using this formula you can start your own successful ecommerce website. Thank you for visiting our new site!
As everyone knows, the best Christmas present in the whole world is a custom skin from Custom Skins. We know this because The Duke of Cambridge is buying one for The Dutchess of Cambridge, and vice-versa. We already had our 'by appointment to the Queen' warrant from when we printed big drumskins for some kind of royal marching band, and when we did the drum heads for Queen.
BUT what if you need a stocking filler and have run out of coal, satsumas and broken glass? Don't worry guys, I've sorted it.
GOODNIGHT KEITH MOON. A book!
Yep, it is a book I'm afraid guys, but don't worry, it's mostly pictures. Based on the classic children's book 'Goodnight Moon', this beautiful piece of literature is in quite poor taste but pretty damn amusing as a result. Here's what THE NEWYORKER had to say:
“Morbidly funny … this book has something for all ages. For the grandparent, a nostalgic game of find the Who reference; the parent, a sad reminder of how cool things used to be; and for the kid, tucked into bed listening to the the most inappropriate bed time story ever, a lesson: old people are weird [and] alcohol kills.”
This book makes a great gift for anyone interested in drumming, Keith Moon, or drug overdoses. And the great news is that here at Customskins we have non-exclusive rights to sell it direct to you!
Here's the deal..
You supply us with £6.99 using the PayPal link below. We will then pack the book in a special padded envelope and dispatch it to your door. If you would like me to sign it or write a special festive inscription to your loved one simply email me upon payment. Did I mention I'm paying for the shipping out of my own pocket? I am!*
*Technically I'm not.
Shipping to those of you lucky enough not to reside in the United Kingdom will incur an additional premium of my choosing.
Seriously guys, this is a terrific and only slightly upsetting gift. Why not buy a highly recommended product from a company you trust? Because there's no time! Here's the payment link:
Quantity 1 Copy FREE SHIPPING £6.99 GBP
2 Copies FREE SHIPPING £12.00 GBP
It’s been a while since the last blog post. How are you? In case you haven’t noticed it’s now 2011. I thought I’d better post a little somethin’ somethin’ up or the blog post following directly on from the Customskins Review of 2010 will be the Customskins Review of 2011, and we’ll all be a little closer to our graves without any blog bants.
Fortunately, we’ve teamed up with hot new drum accesorisers STAGEWORKS to give away not one but two amazing new drumming products!!!
First up, we have the amazing new Stageworks matt. Hold up though! You wouldn’t want to scrape the dead hedgehogs off the soles of your shows on THIS badboy. Oh no. It’s a special musical instrumenty matt which stops your whole bass drum pedal falling in the lake or onto the tracks. Oh yes. Here’s what it the box looks like:
Look at that! It has triple triple layer technology, like a club sandwich! And you get two of them. Here’s some photographic evidence of what it does:
To give you an idea of size, here it is next to a sledgehammer:
Pretty sweet huh? Go and clear a space in your livingroom for it.
The next item we are giving away is a StageWorks Rimma. I know what you’re thinking! Yes, it is manufactured by the same company as the matts.
This is a device for holding your sticks/jazz cigarettes whilst you’re playing the drums. Without one your sticks are going to be in the canal and you’re going to be airdrumming. EMBARRASING! Here’s what the product looks like:
Pretty sweet huh? And the inside of the box is all gold and satiny like a gift from God:
Here they are! Once again, you get two:
Once again, so you can clear some space, here’s one next to a sledgehammer:
So there we have it. Stageworks assure us that these are crucial accessories for any tubthumper, but to make absolutely sure we tested them on famous drum player Neil Peart. Here’s the results:
WITHOUT STAGEWORKS MATT AND RIMMA:
Neil doesn’t look very happy, does he? Let’s try it…
WITH STAGEWORKS MATT AND RIMMA:
Result! They work. Neil is now a very happy chap indeed.
Here’s the competition bit!
To win BOTH items simply answer the following multiple choice question in the comments. As ever, one of the entries will win. Here’s the question:
What other product has a suggestive name?
I will personally pick a winner on the 30th September, and they can start clearing some space in their lounge. Good luck!
Oh, and if you don’t win I STRONGLY recommend you buy these products anyway. They’re very good and not very expensive and will make your life better: