A lot of people come up to me and ask how much a custom skin is and naturally I reply that if you have to ask you can’t afford it. This isn’t true, of course, as they’re only £99.99 and I only say it because I heard it once on TV or in a public toilet. Most people *can* afford £99.99 – it’s the price of three pints in Customskins’ local pub. But enough about gentrification, let’s talk about expensive boats.
I went to the London International Boat Show once and they had all kinds of boats. Big boats, little boats, boats which make you sick, boats which make other people sick. You could go in some of the boats and fairly realistically imagine you were a prosthetic limb billionaire, if it weren’t for all the other people in the boat also pretending they were prosthetic limb billionaires.
The London Drum Show
is a bit like this except you can’t go inside the drums and drink a gin, and instead of imagining yourself to be a wealthy jetsetter you imagine yourself to be the drummer in AC/DC, which is almost equally as exciting. They have drums for rock, drums for jazz, drums for transporting oil, all the drums. You can look at them and touch them and imagine divorcing your wife so you can put them all in your house and be happy forever.
This year (2014) is extra special as Customskins.co.uk will be there. You can look at the customed skins, look at us, and buy us all the beer you owe us for getting drum skins to you extra quickly so Jools Holland knows which band to point at when he reads out your name on the autocue.
And when you come up to me at the London Drum Show and ask how much a custom skin is I will reply Sir (even if you are female), it is your lucky day, for we are offering a show special 20% discount. Therefore, a customskin is £99.99 minus 20% – a mere two and a half pints at Customskins’ local.
If you are attending the show please come and say hello to us – we’ll be on stand 72. If you’re not attending the show, I apologise profusely for wasting your time.